Sunday, November 6, 2011
A night at the club! Yes, at my age.
I am here, I am sorry I don't post more, but I will make a conscious effort to do so more often! So here is my latest:
To celebrate a friend's 40th Birthday we went to a dance club that caters to an "older" crowd. We got hooked up with VIP service and our own booth, which gave me an awesome view of the scene.
Now, as someone who never goes to clubs anymore, I was able to observe with a fresh perspective! I have decided that after one visit, I am qualified to be an expert in clubgear and club etiquette.
Some do's and don'ts:
DON'T wear skin tight dresses if doing so makes you look pregnant, or if you have rolls that can't be managed with Spanx. There are plenty of other clothing options, ladies!
DO hurry up in the bathroom and by one in the morning, you shouldn't bother with rearranging your "girls" or spraying a cloud of hairspray around your head. I don't think either of these actions will affect things for you at this point.
DON'T yell at people in the bathroom telling them they are doing "Bullsh-- business" and holding up the line. No one will move any faster.
DO try to make servers who spill things like an entire tray of vodka, glasses, orange juice, cranberry juice, and ice in front of your group feel less embarrassed. It can be awkward to say the least. Probably because the entire spilling episode took a really long time to end. Did I mention it can be awkward? And loud.
DON'T wear dresses that are too short. Here are some ways to tell....If your underwear is visible, or your cheeks hang out, that's a clear indication.
Did you know that wearing fishnets stockings can cut you? They can. I saw it happen.
DON"T wear shoes that you have the tendency to fall in, especially when drinking.
DO stop drinking if you are walking around with your eyes closed.
DON'T cop a feel on the dance floor. You risk bodily injury or harm.
I think this should cover it. All in all, I had a great time! I got to see people doing all kinds of strange and funny things and had friends who made me laugh until my stomach hurt. I realized that I just don't get out much late at night anymore. I forgot how much happens when your out and about late into the evening!