Freak Magnet Friday!

Today's story has had some logistics changed as it is a work-related story. Ok, so I used to work at this elementary school, and at this school we have custodians! No surprise there, but one of them is a bit strange, freakish, if you will. He is the kind of person who mumbles underneath his breath to no one in particular. When you walk by him he purposefully looks away even though you are face to face, making too awkward to say hello or anything. Of course, he has chosen ME (and probably others) to exhibit his weirdness. Here are some excerpts from some of our painful but short interactions on campus:

Example a).

Me: Hi, I locked my keys in my office, could you open my door?

Him: Oh, so now you talk to me...when you need something.

Me: What do you mean? You never say anything to me either.

Him: The woman is supposed to be the one to start contact with the man.

Me: huh? (awkward smile/silence)

Example b).

Him: You know Happy Hour starts at four o'clock.

Me: Okayyyy....

Him: (next day) I went to your office, you said you were taking me to Happy Hour but you didn't. I see how you are.

Me: I never said I was taking you to Happy Hour! Happy Hour where?

him: Yes, you did. Remember when I told you about Happy hour yesterday? That's when.

Me: (thinking) "Estas loco!"

Example c).

Him: What do you do in your office all day, sleep? Everyday I wonder what you do in there. I really, really wonder, do you just come in, collect your paycheck and leave? I should have gone to college so I can get a job where I can go in and sleep the whole time. One day I am going to find out what you're doing in there, just wait.

Me: (thinking) Should I get mad or just feel sorry for him? Get a restraining order?

Last example: One time one of our new, very young teachers called him on his walkie and asked him to help her hang something up on her wall. He LITERALLY tripped over things running to get to her classroom, like she said she was on fire or something! This was hilarious! Aaah, puppy love...

And so on! You might read this and think he is just trying to joke around, banter with me, right? I would think so too, but he is not smiling or laughing when he says these things to me, it is very weird. He also told me that the entire staff at one point or another has bought him lunch and that I haven't bought him lunch yet, so....ugh!!!

Who knows what his story is? I know that when I do lock myself out of my office from time to time, that I am going to have a painful weird conversation to go along with it!

Thanks for reading! Happy Friday!